Well, just when I thought my two friends could not get any dumber…..
So, I am 10’6″ of pure woman. So, when we come to bridges that are under 10’6″ it is prudent to find a different route. That is, unless, your name is Brett Isaacson. You see, Brett seems to think he is an expert on how high things are because he works on a basketball court and he knows how high ten feet is because all b-ball hoops are ten feet tall.
So, brilliant Brett will simply jump up and if he can touch something with his fingers he knows its ten feet. That’s because he knows he can jump up and touch the rim on a basketball court (so maybe white men can jump, but they sure as shit ain’t smart). So, back to the story. Brett and his other brilliant friend David Assa decide to do the jump test at this bridge that says 10’1″. Brett does not come close to touching it and so he surmises it must be 11 feet tall, at least.
There’s definitely no chance it could be that Brett is getting old and maybe he can’t jump up to ten feet as easily as he used to.
So, with the jump test complete, my two captains decide it’s time to head under the bridge. And voila, we actually make it unscathed. Fast forward one week, and we are back in the same neighborhood but coming from the other direction. Well, Vanessa and Brett think: we made it under once, surely we will make it under the bridge again. Without doing the jump test from this side of the road they simply put the pedal to the metal and hurdle me forward.
Halfway under the bridge…BAM!!!
We all hear a loud screeching noise. I haven’t felt pain like that since my 1st time….driving. We luckily don’t get stuck and make it through. Vanessa was driving so she pulls over and Brett climbs onto my leaky roof (that’s a whole other story) and sees the damage.
The cover to the A.C. vent was cracked but luckily that is all. Hopefully these two numb nuts will learn. 10’6″ is greater than 10’1″ no matter how many jump tests you do.